Eggs and Sausage

  I'm hungry, it's 2pm and I haven't eaten yet. I'm hungry, though have to wait for my stomach to settle. I feel like eating eggs. I would ask for eggs over easy, if I knew what the hell eggs over easy meant. I'll probably just have a sausage.

  I stumbled in at 5am this morning after having a ball. Full of free beer and a sandwich called 'Super Mario' I fell into bed and woke up groggy six hours later.

  Last night I played at Sip. I played for longer than I thought I would. I turned up, laptop and kaoss pad in hand and settled onto the bar. Mike threw me a beer and a smile and asked if I was still up for it. 

  "Sure" I replied, taking note of everyone in there nodding their heads in satisfaction to the sounds of Mick and the stones. "Sure" I quietly reassured myself.

  The girl from the night before was there, she beamed a big smile and held her hand up for a big high five. I duly responded, and so, we held hands. For roughly a second.

  The guy who owns the place tipped up, along with a quirky artist who paints pictures of Abe Lincoln. The artist is very funny. Very cool. We get on and make each other laugh.

  I spoke to the girl for a while, she asked me if I had been bothered by the two old guys the night before. I told her they were great conversation, but I don't give up my sexuality that easily. She smiled and said "good".

  "You good to go?" The owner asked

  "Yeah definitely" I responded.

  I climbed up to the DJ booth, and ripped my fucking trousers again. This, I now remember is how I did them in the first place. I made space for my laptop, plugged it in, hooked into the second channel of the mixer and waited for Mick Jagger to stop howling. He stopped after roughly six minutes. There were eyes on me, I was some sort of exhibit up there.

  "What does the English man play?" I could read on lips.

  

As promised I started off with Augenblicke, a tune that is quite directionless really, nice to set a scene with. As I got going I started feeling pretty wobbly, my hangover was still whispering in my mind. I quickly skulled the remainder of my beer, and instantly felt better.

  I played quite a lot of techno for the first hour, just laid back stuff, it gave me a lot of opportunities to play around with effects.

  As I progressed I let everyone dip their toes into the different stuff, and realised that the tech house was going down a real treat, so that's where I took it. A small Dominican guy with a bald head and a six inch beard was going buck wild by the bar. This made me smile. He threw his arms around and seemed to be either enjoying the music, or enjoying the music at my expense.

  I noticed the artist doing a little more than nodding too. That was cool. The owner then came up to me and said he was fucking loving it, and didn't expect this at all. By now I was just chucking anything and everything on top of each other.

  I let 'the reward is cheese' end things and got down off my perch. People patted my back, and smiled. I put a cigarette in my mouth and went outside. 

  "Nice fucking tunes man" The artist said, leaning against the window like some sort of nouveau Dick Tracey. 

  "Cheers" Said I, shivering in a t shirt and Jeans that provide a panoramic view of my genitals.

  

I went back inside and drank free beer. People gave me their telephone numbers and we clinked our glasses. I felt the least homesick I have done all week. I'm a local now. The owner asked me to come back and DJ this weekend for a few nights. I said maybe. Maybe.

There was a tall Spanish girl with her tall friends at the bar, they asked me lots of questions. I spoke to their breasts for a few minutes. The Swedish girl from the hostel came in and we exchanged pleasantries, she is one of those girls that is so ridiculously good looking, she seems constantly surrounded by guys. For this reason I decide to leave these girls alone, I may be hungry, but I'm no vulture.

I spoke more to the bar girl. We talked about Joni Mitchell and the east village. The more I spoke to her, the more tired I got. We briefly flirted, until I decided I needed sleep. I guzzled my beer, put a cigarette in my mouth and left. The girl gave me her number, though I doubt i'll call.

As I started turning down the street the Swedish girl sparked up a conversation with me. We talked about America, Europe and drinking. She said she was trying to find an apartment. I said I wasn't.

We said goodbye and I stumbled home.